I first discovered the reformed faith in my mid-twenties. I went on a journey of discovery, learning from pastors and friends over coffee and dinner. I read and researched with the time I had, and I gained a strong foundation in theology through the discipleship of my local church. When I did have kids, I taught part time at a local community college. My classes were online, and I had great flexibility around them. When the kids were asleep or watching Thomas the Train, I could read, research and write. For years, I was able to slowly but surely add to my theological foundation. I had margin in my life to do so, and I worked to keep that margin, knowing that I would be better at everything else I did if I was growing daily in my understanding of the deep things of the Word of God.
Fast forward a few years. My boys are now 12 and 14. Though they don’t need me in the same way they did as toddlers, they still need me as an engaged parent as much as ever. But life circumstances have also funneled me down to taking a full-time teaching job. I love my job, but it, along with parenting my children and participating in our presbytery’s new church plant, has officially taken all the flexibility and margin out of my life.
I no longer have time or mental energy to research the types of commentaries or online theological discussions I used to find intriguing and informative. Yet, my need to live in light of the deep truths of the Word of God is as strong as ever.