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So far Christina Fox has created 797 blog entries.

Parenting Adult Children

BARBARANNE KELLY|CONTRIBUTOR This weekend I helped my daughter peel potatoes. We were having company for dinner, and I’d asked Kate to make her roasted garlic mashed potatoes to go along with the main dish that was braising in the oven. As we stood side-by-side at the sink, she commented on the difference in how we wielded our peelers. “I always nick a knuckle when I hold it that way.” I smiled and nodded—regardless of how she holds the peeler, she ends up with a peeled potato. Her recipe differs from mine in other ways: she melts the butter in the microwave, I drop it straight into the hot potatoes; she whisks in chopped thyme from the garden, I settle for salt and pepper; she peels the garlic cloves before roasting them, I roast the bulb whole; her choices of dairy products are richer and more generous than my own; and the cayenne pepper was a surprise. When she was finished, she served up a side dish that could have taken center stage. Kate is the second of our five children, all of whom are grown and flown, four of whom are married, and two of whom are now parents. I’m not writing on the topic of parenting adult children because I’ve figured it out, but as many writers will attest, by this exercise I may learn a lesson or two. Even the terms empty nest and grown and flown are instructive. Our adult children are no longer hatchlings who need us to meet their every need for survival. Nor are they fledglings who need us to manage the larger responsibilities of their lives. They have spread their wings and flown from our nest of parental care into the lives God has ordained for them. I’ll just share the top three lessons on my growing list, because I’m still learning, and, well, there’s a word-limit—which I’ll probably exceed anyway...

Parenting Adult Children2023-03-24T17:49:37+00:00

Using the DASA Committee Report in One Another Care

ANN MAREE GOUDZWAARD|CONTRIBUTOR Helen is a middle-aged woman in your congregation. She has two married children and one teenager who still lives at home. Helen and her husband, John, have been in and out of counseling with their pastor for at least 10 years, yet she continues to have difficulty articulating what exactly is wrong in their marriage. Because of your recognized leadership in the church, Helen comes to you for advice. What should she do? Counsel doesn’t seem to help. How should she respond when John tells her their problems are all in her head? Sometimes she just feels crazy. “Can you help me?” Helen asks. You’re not quite sure where to turn. In 2019, the PCA General Assembly commissioned a study committee to produce a report on domestic and sexual abuse for our denomination (DASA). The committee, consisting of seven teaching and ruling elders, as well as five “expert” (female) advisors, worked together for three years to compile a biblical basis and practical application for pastors and leaders in the PCA to reference as they encounter reports of abuse in the local church. In June 2022 the committee released their report. I served on this project and had the privilege of interviewing victims and listening to their stories. When the report released, victims and people helpers asked how to use it to help minister to women in crisis. My hope is to answer that question and inspire confidence to effectively help victims like Helen...

Using the DASA Committee Report in One Another Care2023-03-24T17:49:52+00:00

Gaining Perspective in the Midst of Life Transitions

MEAGHAN MAY|CONTRIBUTOR The first time my husband and I moved to Florida, we had only been married a year. We didn’t know anyone, but as optimistic Midwesterners we prepared to move to the sub-south. I quickly learned that the formerly “fixed” points of my life were not to be found in the land of lizards great and small. Moments after crossing the state line, our air conditioning went out. We spent the remaining miserable hours sticking to the vinyl U-Haul seats in standstill traffic and praying a breeze would find its way through our open windows. Hours later, we unloaded our hand-me-down furniture into temporary storage. I was sticky, weary, and overwhelmed as I stumbled down the ramp. In slow motion, I recall dropping everything to brace myself and blurting out, “I hate Florida!” Christians experience transitions in life. Some changes are expected, and others seem to come-out-of-nowhere. These transitions disorient us and leave us unsteady. We want to go back to what we know in an effort to find security, comfort, and a sense of control. But as that option eludes our grasp, God teaches us to rest in His grip. I often remind myself that I can’t count on today to look like yesterday; my comfort is that God is the same yesterday, today, and tomorrow...

Gaining Perspective in the Midst of Life Transitions2023-03-24T17:50:02+00:00

Labor Day for Caregivers

STEPHANIE HUBACH|CONTRIBUTOR Most of us think about Labor Day as a day for eating hot dogs and hamburgers, getting that last taste of fresh farmstand produce, and signifying the beginning-of-the end of summer. Where I grew up in Maryland, it also represented the last day of childhood freedom before the new school year began. The actual history of Labor Day, however, harkens back to the late nineteenth century, when organized labor groups sought recognition for the work of laborers in society during the Industrial Revolution. Today, I’d like to honor a group of laborers who are as diverse and disconnected as can be imagined, and yet contribute significantly to the health and well-being of society: caregivers. When we think of labor, our minds tend to gravitate to manual labor and workers who receive wages in the marketplace in exchange for their efforts. But there is an entire army of laborers who care for people who lack the ability to care for themselves. Caregiving is a voluntary role, borne out of the need for assistance. This care can include physical care, emotional care, spiritual care, financial care, and logistical supports. Caregivers may care for young children, people with disabilities, people with chronic illnesses, or the elderly. In other words, caregivers are the unsung heroes and the unpaid labor force of the family economic system...

Labor Day for Caregivers2023-03-24T17:50:08+00:00

The Body Part 2: Embodied Living

TARA GIBBS|CONTRIBUTOR Have you heard the word “embodied” being used more in the last few years? If asked to define that word a few years ago, I would have defined it “represents” or “lives out” as in, “She embodies the values of her home church.” But people are talking a lot more these days about a different definition of embodiment, one that addresses what it means to inhabit our physical bodies. As we observe our culture today, we see more and more confusion about how much our physical body defines who we are. Modern culture seems increasingly inclined to separate identity from our physical reality. It is not uncommon today for someone to decide who they are by how they “feel,” divorced from the physical reality of their bodies. As Christians, we must continue to consider, “Do our physical bodies and what we do with them matter to God?”...

The Body Part 2: Embodied Living2023-03-24T17:50:18+00:00

Tips for Planning a Women’s Ministry Retreat

CHRISTINA FOX|EDITOR People often ask me, “What do you enjoy the most: writing or speaking?” I usually respond by saying, “Both.” Writing is my first love; speaking is a surprise love. I began retreat speaking because writing and speaking go hand in hand. It’s something I’m supposed to do as a writer because it is a helpful way to promote my books. But what surprised me was how much I enjoy it. I love meeting women from across the country and learning how God is at work in their communities. It encourages my heart to see the Body thriving and laboring for the Kingdom in places far and wide. The church universal is beautiful and I love meeting her. As a speaker, I’ve attended numerous retreats over the years. As a women’s ministry coordinator, I also help plan retreats for my church. The following are some tips for those who are preparing a retreat for their own church...

Tips for Planning a Women’s Ministry Retreat2023-03-24T17:50:24+00:00

No Empty Word: Five Reasons to Join Your Church Bible Study

SARAH IVILL|CONTRIBUTOR Fall has always been my favorite time of the year. Many women I know associate fall with the beginning of another school year. But I associate it with a new year of women’s ministry, particularly a new year of women’s Bible studies. I am excited that many churches are gearing up to kick-off a year of helping women grow in their relationship with God and their relationship with one another. As brochures are sent out, and registration emails arrive in your inbox, many of you are eager to sign up. But I also know that some of you are undecided about whether or not you have time in your schedule to attend a women’s Bible study. You are calculating the cost and feeling unsettled about if you should commit. Let me encourage you, then, with several reasons why you should say “Yes” to studying the word of God alongside the women in your church.    Consider the words of Moses, “God’s word is no empty word for me, but my very life, and by this word I will live” (Deut. 32:45-46). In addressing the Jews, Jesus clarifies, “You search the Scriptures because you think that in them you have eternal life; and it is they that bear witness about me” (John 5:39). The purpose of studying Scripture is to lead us to Christ. The written word reveals the living word that “became flesh and dwelt among us” in order to reveal His glory, which is full of grace and truth (John 1:14). We should say “Yes” to Bible study because Scripture leads us to Christ...  

No Empty Word: Five Reasons to Join Your Church Bible Study2023-03-24T17:50:29+00:00

When All I Have is a Mustard Seed

JESSICA ROAN|GUEST I had the noblest of intentions. Really, I did. It was just a six-week study, and there are ten weeks of summer break. How hard could it be? I even picked up the book and paid for it on time, and then, it sat wrapped in plastic on my piano. The first few weeks of summer had proved to be busier than expected-imagine that. Driver’s Ed, tennis lessons, the book I needed to read for the class I’m taking, long-neglected projects at home soon took over, and I didn’t even peel the plastic off the book. Then, the weekend before we were to start the summer Bible study, I realized I needed to take my son to his first flute lesson on the night of the first meeting. Sigh. So, as I waited for him to finish, I reluctantly tore the wrapping off of the book and began to read. I only got through day one during those 30 minutes. Where was I supposed to be? Starting week two. When I taught special education and at-risk students, I had a saying: There is no time for perfectionism here. For many of my students, getting the needed credits for graduation required that they focus on the larger, more important assignments and tests and let some of the small things go. Their learning and personal challenges did not allow for them to do everything on the class list. While I don’t usually struggle with perfectionism, my struggle with my immediate failure to keep up with a summer Bible study disappointed me. I needed this focus on scripture in my life; how could I fail so miserably? The Bible has good news for those who fail to maintain spiritual discipline and it has less to do with us, and everything to do with God...

When All I Have is a Mustard Seed2023-03-24T17:50:37+00:00

Why Should I Study the Same Book Again?

CHRISTINE GORDON|GUEST It’s fall again. You survived the record heat of the summer, navigated the difficult relationships within your extended family on your July vacation, and the kids, grandkids, nieces, or nephews are finally going back to school. The women’s ministry at your church announces the topic of study for the fall: Ephesians. Immediately you think, “But I’ve already studied that! I just did it a few years ago!”  Before you decide you’re out for the semester and schedule your weekly chiropractic appointment during Bible study hour, pause and consider. Maybe there is a good reason to study the same book again. Maybe your time could be well spent diving into some content you’ve already covered. Why? This Author and His Story are Different Think about other literature you may have reread in the past. Do you have a favorite story or novel you come back to? Maybe you miss certain characters and enjoy meeting them again for the first time, knowing the adventure that lies ahead of them. In the play “Shadowlands,” C.S. Lewis’s character says, “We read to know we are not alone.” It’s no wonder we come back to the stories we love. But what about the ultimate story?...

Why Should I Study the Same Book Again?2023-03-24T17:50:42+00:00

Your Unwanted Journey: Facing Your Husband’s Pornography Struggle

“God, I come to you very weak and broken. Grieved over the sin of my husband that I just discovered. Shocked—feeling betrayed—angry—distrustful—sad at sin’s corrupting power—very aware of my own desperate need for grace as I must confront him.” I wrote these words in a journal entry when I discovered evidence on my computer’s history that my husband had been visiting pornographic sites. Although I knew of his struggle prior to our marriage, I naively assumed that he was done battling pornography and that our marital bliss would provide the antidote he needed against temptation. My dreams of a happy, secure marriage in which I felt compellingly beautiful to my husband were instantly shattered that afternoon—barely more than a year into our marriage. It was made worse by the fact that just the day before I had asked him if he had been struggling lately with pornography, and he said, 'No.'” I remember getting the call from this woman. She was devastated, confused, and angry. Pornography usage is an unfaithful behavior that breaks the sacred promise: I am devoted and faithful to you alone. We might even call it treason of the marriage covenant, though some may think this too dramatic or stern. But aren’t husbands called to faithful oneness to their wife, to lay down their lives for her? She, of course, is called to the same, but why is it that church leaders can minimize the traumatic impact of porn, as well as the grave sin of sexual infidelity—which porn viewing is?...

Your Unwanted Journey: Facing Your Husband’s Pornography Struggle2023-03-24T17:50:49+00:00
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